One vodka, two vodka,three vodka...

I imagine myself driving and think of the moment I'm just going to abandon all hope, close my eyes and let go of the wheel. That's how much of a shitty driver I think I'll be, even though I love cars and know a surprising amount about them( also I dream of having a collection of vintage cars...and wines...and clothes....ok, I dream about being rich). Also is it weird that I'm afraid of people making fun of my bad driving because I'm a woman and therefore stereotypically a bad driver? It's sort of become a pet peeve of mine, therefore I use public transport to get around(tube and streetcar, never  bus, gross!). I see thousands of people come and go every day on the tube and sometimes I like to play a game in my head; which might make me sound like a total psycho but it's all good fun. Or a kind of social experiment if you will. I like to examine their faces and body language and imagine what kind of mental illness(I have a deep interest and curiosity when it comes to clinical psychology) they would have if any, or if they were criminals what kind they would be. You know, when you see someone who's just got pedophile written all over him?That sort of thing. I also like to judge outfits and guess life stories so it's not all macabre. Today I was noticing this guy who was on his cellphone using a hands-free that he was holding up to his mouth, which is totally infuriating since it negates the whole purpose of a hands-free and just sends me into a silent rage every time I see it...anyway, he had this t-shirt on that read one vodka two vodka three vodka drop dead. It was red with white letters and I just had to snap a picture. Not because it was a particularly attractive t-shirt nor was it catchy but mainly because while I get the humor, it got me thinking. If you "drop dead" after three vodkas you just don't deserve to drink,
son. Three drinks is the minimal requirement during the pre-gaming stage, the stage where you sweet-talk your liver into (please) not failing. Bless your little heart, down after three vodkas. Unless it's bottles, in which case I applaud you and you have earned my respect. This may make me sound like a raging alcoholic but no, I just enjoy the miracle that is alcohol in most environments social or otherwise. And though it may seem completely unrelated to my prologue, I would never in fact drink and drive and people who do disgust me, so in conclusion I think for now I'm happy taking the tube and judging people who obviously haven't met me and my friends and their stupid t-shirts.